Neurodiversity glossary
The words that come up again and again, explained simply and kindly.
Plain-language definitions for words you will see across this blog and in many neurodivergent spaces. Each term links to a post that goes deeper.
Looking for a place to start reading? Visit the Start Here page.
- AuDHD
A community term for someone who is both autistic and has ADHD. The two can support each other and also pull in opposite directions.
Read more: AuDHD in kids and teens
- Co-regulation
When a calm, caring adult helps a child settle their nervous system. Kids learn to calm themselves by being calmed by someone else first.
Read more: Regulation before reasoning
- Demand avoidance
A strong pull to resist everyday requests, often driven by anxiety and a need for autonomy. PDA is a related profile that is not a separate diagnosis in the DSM-5 or ICD-11.
Read more: Demand avoidance and PDA
- Executive function
The brain skills that help us plan, start tasks, switch gears and hold information in mind. Many neurodivergent kids find these skills harder, which is not the same as not trying.
Read more: AuDHD in kids and teens
- Hyperarousal and hypoarousal
Two ways a nervous system can leave its window of tolerance. Hyperarousal can look panicky or explosive. Hypoarousal can look numb or far away.
Read more: Regulation before reasoning
- Interoception
The sense that tells us what is happening inside the body, like hunger or a racing heart. It can work very differently in neurodivergent kids.
Read more: Interoception and body signals
- Masking
Hiding neurodivergent traits, like stims or discomfort, to fit in. Masking can look like coping from the outside while costing a lot of energy on the inside.
Read more: What neurodivergent-affirming therapy means
- Meltdown
An intense response to overwhelm, when a person temporarily loses control of their behavior. A meltdown is not a tantrum and is not a choice.
Read more: Meltdown or tantrum?
- Neurodivergent
Having a brain that works differently from what is considered typical, such as being autistic, ADHD, AuDHD or dyslexic.
Read more: What neurodivergent-affirming therapy means
- Neurodivergent-affirming
An approach that treats neurodivergent brains as natural variations, not problems to fix, and builds support around a child’s real needs.
Read more: What neurodivergent-affirming therapy means
- Restraint collapse
When a child holds it together all day, often at school, and then falls apart once they reach a safe place like home.
Read more: After-school restraint collapse
- Rupture and repair
The natural cycle of disconnection and reconnection in every relationship. Coming back together after a hard moment is what builds trust.
Read more: Connection over compliance
- Secure base and safe haven
Ideas from the Circle of Security model. Kids explore the world from a secure base and return to a safe haven for comfort.
Read more: Connection over compliance
- Sensory overload
When the brain receives more sensory input than it can process at once, like noise or bright light.
Read more: Sensory overload: signs by age
- Serve and return
Back-and-forth, responsive moments between a child and a caring adult. The Harvard Center on the Developing Child describes these exchanges as building blocks for the brain.
Read more: Behavior is communication
- Shutdown
The quiet side of overwhelm, when a person goes still or withdrawn. Shutdowns are easy to miss because they do not disrupt the room.
Read more: Autistic shutdown
- Special interest
An intense, focused passion for a topic or activity. Special interests can support regulation and connection.
Read more: Special interests as a superpower
- Stimming
Repetitive movements or sounds that help a person regulate, like rocking or flapping. Autistic adults describe stimming as an important coping tool.
Read more: Stimming explained
- Validation
Letting someone know their feelings make sense, even if you do not agree with their actions. Validation is a core skill in DBT.
Read more: DBT skills for kids and teens
- Window of tolerance
A term from psychiatrist Dan Siegel for the zone where a person can feel big feelings and still cope.
Read more: Regulation before reasoning